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To go from one extreme to another, the second thing i did was a music festival. I don’t exactly plan to visit festivals along the way, but it is always a nice extra. Besides, it was my first attempt on an Austrian festival.
I was a bit shocked at first. The organization seemed terrible. The waiting queues gave the impression to be endless and there were close to no garbage bins! The catering seemed not so clean (someone was mixing noodles with his hands and there was no place to wash your hand in the whole area, so i let you to your imagination to figure out what this means…).
A lot of the bands where quite bad. Many of them where Austrian bands i think because i never heard of them, but everyone else could sing along.
My expectations where dropping quite fast in the beginning but i realized i was comparing all the bad things from this festival with all the good things of the festivals in Belgium. That way, of course, it could never become a good experience! There is only one solution for that kind of fussy disease. Drink some beers and just start watching concerts. (There were 4 stages during the day and 3 during the night, so finding something that suits you is quite an easy thing)
One of the first bands that gave a good impression was Wallis Bird. It is not the kind of music i would listen to (a bit too girly pop-music) but they did a great job to put up a good show.
Another very fortunate discovery was Pivot. Their band was not complete (only 2 out of 3 members where present) but even so, they still where very good. Both the drummer and the guitarist played with a lot of energy, it was clear they aimed to make their live performance an unforgettable experience. My biggest surprise however was after the festival when I listened to them on myspace. Their songs where clearly the same, but while during the concert they played loud and with power, the songs on their albums were more subtle and better suited for at home. If a mix of electronic and rock music could be something for you, you should definitely check them out!
if you ever have the chance to go see the black box revelation I would strongly consider wasting that chance right away. They are a Belgium band (from Brussels) and they do a very bad job at being musical ambassadors. I listened to the first song they played and I honestly can’t find a good comment to say. The music of the song was dull and the chords where easy. The song really seemed like a 5 minutes job. And it seems to be one of their main songs. I can’t remember which one it is, but its on their myspace, so just check it out yourself to discover how great they are.
Friday evening they finally played. The main reason I was there. The one band I could see over and over again. Right after a less than average Block Party performance the stage was drastically changed for what promised to be an amazing Radiohead moment. It is common knowledge that in general bands perform less well on festivals than on concerts (more often playback, less impressive stage, ect.) But what Radiohead showed there, was simply amazing. It was the same stage setup they did on some concerts. And the light work on its own was already worth looking at. I fully enjoyed it from the beginning till the end. And if you somewhat like Radiohead and saw them life, I am sure you will understand my enthusiasm.
Another one where we had a lot of fun was the Prodigy. The genre is not really my cup of tea but if you forget about good behavior and are able to just get yourself go loose, they are a very entertaining band. It was the last band of the evening, and it started to rain a little bit. But it seemed like no one had problems with that. The rain was completely ignored and thousands of people where jumping on the sound of the beat.
(Thanks a lot for taking me there. It was an unforgettable experience, and without you I would never have been there…)
I am very tempted to say that it is sitting way to long in a painful position while doing nothing else then looking at a wall.
I got the opportunity to go on a Sesshin right after i resigned my job and i figured it would be a nice way to separate the working period i left behind, from the travelling period coming ahead. So before i had the time to think twice about this, there i was at the monastery sitting on my square meter spot in a dusty crypt.
For those of you wondering if this isn't a bit boring? Yes! Yes yes yes and yes!
I mean, seriously, how could you even ask this question? The reason you never spend your weekend doing this is exactly because it is boring.
But there are things to do....in the beginning that is. You might find this silly but once you start looking at a wall there are many details on it that you can learn to ... enjoy?
Even then, after the first 2 sets of meditation, i was out of ideas to keep my brain busy. Because the mind had nothing else to do it started focusing all its attention on my left leg that felt asleep. Thus noticing with the exaggeration only boredom can bring that it was painful. I learnt the hard way that it is something you don't want! The more your mind focuses on the painful parts of your body the more they start to become painful.
I tried to move my legs and my body a little bit. Although the goal was to relieve myself from the pain, it only resulted in worse. Every movement i made increased the suffering and other parts of the my body started to join the party.
Pain pain pain: i was disgusted! I wanted to hear the sound of the gong, informing us that the meditation session is over for now. Instead a voice started screaming in my head: i want the gong now! But of course, this didn't change much. The harder my thoughts screamed for the gong, the more i felt frustrated about not hearing it. I had no choice but to accept that the meditation session wouldn't be over just because i wanted it.
I believe meditation to be quite a psychological thing. When my mind had to face the unfortunate truth that screaming angry for the gong had no effect, it shifted into sadness and self pity. I had only one thought that came into my mind. Why on earth did i join this Sesshin? I am never going to go through with it. I am gonna die here.
(Yea, i know, my imagination was running a bit wild, i realise now i was no where close to die!)
Anyways. Since the gong refused to come and my mind wasn't going to make me forget my pain, i had no choice to start meditating for real. I was sitting in a very pitiful way, so I pulled my back straight and concentrated myself as good as i could on the zazen position. With every breathing-in i re-adjusted my position again to make sure it wouldn't get worse over time, and with every breathing out i waved away the silly thoughts of my mind.
You might expect a happy end, where the pain goes away and i manage to find the budistic truth of meditation along with the sound of the gong saving the day...
None of that. I was still very aware of all that suffering, but it was acceptable. It wasn't so hard suddenly nor was the pain so annoyingly present in my thoughts anymore.
We can chose to experience the same situation through different angles. It wont change a thing to what is happening, but it will change alot to how you percieve it and how it affects you.
I know this is nothing new. Certainly a lot of wise and/or crazy people have mentionned this before, and i understood what they ment. But now that i experienced it in such a clear way, it feels like i understood it for the first time all over again.
I am sure we more or less experience this often, but since we pay no attention to it, we have no clue that it happened. And although here it happened for the better, the same could also happen in the other direction!
That was way more philosophical and spiritual then i wanted to go.
For the rest of the Sesshin, since it was in a classical christian monastery, the food was terrible! (by terrible i mean the next best thing after poison). If you saw the food that was in my plate, and saw how the nuns of the monastery looked like, you would strongly consider not eating at all! I will spare you the details...
The location of the monastery was splendid! It was a huge park with a lot of nice plants (eatable plants! way better then the monastery kitchen!)
For some reason i have no pictures of the park, but i do have some of the crypts where we spend our days meditating.
In the end i had quite a good time during the Sesshin, but i don't think it is something for me. Although it is far from being a sect, it has some...similarities...like strange chanting (mata hannya haramita shinyooo-ooo) and some bizarre rituals that make me feel uneasy and that i find a bit ridiculous.
The start sign has been given...i am on my way to the world now!
